There are a lot of times where we feel very anxious. I personally get really anxious when I’m in a huge crowd. I’m not agoraphobic or anything, it’s just that large crowds make it too easy for things to happen. Like kidnapping, muggings, pick pockets, etc. Plus I can’t help but to imagine that horrible disaster scenario . You know that one that starts off at the beginning just after finding out that shit has popped off. All of a sudden the mob runs towards the nearest exit. People get trampled, and lots of other horrible things. Makes me shutter just thinking about it.
I find myself to be the most anxious while waiting at the doctor’s office. It really doesn’t matter what I’m there for, whether it’s something small like a routine flu shot, or something serious like surgery. After you register, you sit in the front office next to either that disturbingly sick old lady or that kid that coughs on everything and all the parent does is watch. I always wonder if that’s how the T-virus is going to spread. I’ve watched a lot of horror movies, all of them have that one doctor scene where there is someone who is infected is sitting in the waiting room, coughing, until they fall out and die, covered with those tell-tale lesions. And that has got to be one of my worse fears, to be quarantined. I already know that I’m not going to take the situation well either. The government is going to tell you immediately that you will most likely die because they want you to remain calm so you don’t freak everyone out and cause a scene or a riot. But once those guys in the Haz-mat suits show up, you can bet that you’re fucked. I guess you can say that I’m a little paranoid. I don’t want to end up in a quarantine and not know why or if I’m going to die or not knowing anything at all.
I think my anxiety got worse after I became an adult. Most likely because of all the stuff I’ve seen either on online or in the news. The more you know the more terrifying the world around you becomes. So I just stay in my house prepared for emergencies. I’m not kidding. After moving here and being greeted by the Quake of ‘89, I’ve learned to keep a GREAT emergency kit on hand. I’ve even got a stake in case of vampires and I’ve been reading a ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE. Now that I say it out loud, it does seem a little silly. I still wouldn’t want to take any chances. LOL. I supposed my anxiety and paranoia are linked, but is that true for everyone? Does anxiety and paranoia go hand in hand? Can you have one and not the other? I’ll never know because all the people I know either had anxiety and developed paranoia or vice versa. I guess I will have to save that question for my therapist. In the meantime, I will be sitting in my crib enjoying my nice, peaceful environment, stocked with food and entertainment….. and well prepared for disasters… (Including the paranormal kind.)
Love Always.
